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Three Crimes I Would Commit If Facebook Could Get Me Outta Jail!

Submitted by on November 13, 2009 – 10:34 amOne Comment
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LOL :-) Eff the po-po!

News of Rodney Bradford’s plight has made shockwaves on the Internets. From MediaTakeOut all the way to India, this kid’s situation was a much talked about one and we have a little fun with it after the jump.

Bradford is a New York City resident who was detained by authorities for 12-to-13 days after being accused of breaking into a Brooklyn residence with a gun. The site DNA India cites that he was just eight miles away from his father’s place in Manhattan.

Anyone who lives in New York, let alone Brooklyn, knows the lay of the land to know that something was off. The boy, who was in lock down, eventually won his freedom thanks to the social networking site, Facebook, which showed what he was doing at the time the crime was committed.

The Telegraph reported that Bradford’s comment where he is teasing his girlfriend for “not having joined him to eat pancakes” was accompanied by a time-stamp and was instrumental in the district attorney’s decision to drop the charges.

Bradford could have been sentenced to 25 years in jail if he had been convicted.

W…T…F! Police don’t have any other investigative skills to where they have to resort to just nabbing folks and not allowing them their amendment rights? Well, now that we know that Facebook can be used in a court of law, here are three things I’d do if I knew Facebook was going to get me out of jail.

Rob A Bank:

Say you wouldn’t at least go out and get you some do-re-mi during this recession! I’d go into a nice Manhattan owed bank and make a personal withdrawal that would keep me funded and moving in the right direction to last me and mines for the rest of our live, I’m RIIICCHHH BIIITTCCHHH! Then I’d go back to the Batcave and rest comfortably, knowing that at that moment of time, I was chatting with Bosslady on how to get that AKOO Leather jacket!

Disrespect George W. Bush Jr.:

Of course I would!!! Don’t even ask me why… You’d do the same. ‘Nuff sed… He and his cronies, folks who have the same thinking like him, have put us folks with no power or connections in dire straits. So, yeah, that’d definitely go down!

Rob A Pimp:

Hey!!! The oldest profession in the world has got to have the longest cash flow, right? I’s broke. Free clothes is cool, but that don’t held feed the babies, ya dig?! So, Pookie, Mr. Whitefolks, especially Bishop Magic Don Juan would be on my hit-list. While I’m pokin’ them with a stun gun (pause for those who care), to the fuzz I’d be poking girls on Facebook. In this Digital Age, crime is so easy, even a caveman could do it!

Now, these are all jokes, for you sensitive folks, but I’d love to hear what you would do if you could be saved by Mark Zuckerberg’s invention. Speak on it in the comments section!

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